Revised Goals

I know I haven't been keeping up with posting about WW on this blog, but that doesn't mean I stopped doing WW! Well, I didn't track for about two weeks over Christmas but up until then I kept at it, and since then I'm back on track! At today's weigh-in, I was down 1.8 lbs from the weigh-in before Christmas. I was shocked to hear that, given my overindulgence over the holidays. But I'll take it! And I'll attribute it in part to the muscle I've built from weight lifting over the past few months, which has helped speed up my metabolism and burn calories even when they're from bad foods.

I've fallen a little bit behind on my mini goals because, even though I had a great weigh-in today, it followed a couple of less than great weigh-ins during December. I was supposed to hit the 30 lb. mark today, but I'm only at 27.8. Not far off, but not quite there, so I've revised my goals a bit and laid them out below:

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12  Done, on schedule!
15 lbs. by October 10  Done, on schedule!
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24 Done, one week late (10/31)
20 lbs. by November 7 Done, on schedule!
25 lbs. by December 5 Done, on schedule!
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19 January 9
30 lbs. by January 2 January 17
35 lbs. by January 30 February 6
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 13
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!! 

A Goal Met and Giving Thanks

I clocked a 1.8 pound loss at WW this week, bringing me to an even 20 lbs lost, and putting me back on track with my goal schedule!

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12  Done, on schedule!
15 lbs. by October 10  Done, on schedule!
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24 Done, one week late (10/31)
20 lbs. by November 7 Done, on schedule!
25 lbs. by December 5
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19
30 lbs. by January 2
35 lbs. by January 30
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 20
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!! 

I'm really not sure how that happened, as I definitely went over my points this week. I'm not sure exactly how much I went over, but I'd say it was about 10 points or so. I know there were a few things that I ate while tailgating on Saturday that I forgot to track. I guess this is the point where I'm happy I'm doing weight training instead of being discouraged by it like I was a few weeks ago. I lost a total of 5 pounds in my four weeks of weight training, which is not too shabby. And I think my metabolism is starting to pick up enough that I can eat a little more and, in fact, I need to eat a little more, and still lose weight. I was doing an exercise with a 20 lb weight yesterday and marveling that that is how much weight I've lost. I don't feel that much lighter, so it's pretty cool to have something tangible like that to show me how far I've come. That 20 lb weight is heavy!!

I'm noticing other nice changes too. My biceps definitely feel more defined, though I don't think my arms actually look any different when they're bare. And I'm noticing more definition in my quads, too. Walking down some stairs at work the other day, I could see a nicely defined thigh through my black pants and that was cool to see. I still have miles to go before my naked body will look better, but it's nice to know I can sort of fake it when I'm clothed!

So today, I am thankful for Weight Watchers. I've been at it for 13 weeks now, which is close to the longest I've stuck with any eating plan before. And I don't have any intention of stopping any time soon, or even at all. This is a plan I can live with. I've made it through my birthday, friends' birthdays, gatherings with family, half of football season, the Big E, and tailgating and still keep losing. I've found that I can enjoy myself on these occasions, indulge in the things I love (though in far less quantities than what I used to consume!) and continue to move in the right direction. I'm proud of myself that in 13 weeks of trying to lose weight, I never posted a gain for the week. In fact, I've lost weight 12 out of the 13 weeks. That one pesky week where I stayed the same will forever bother me because it broke a perfect streak, but I know that I'm still doing incredibly well and should be proud of myself. And I am.

Two Things

First, I'm very excited because yesterday I hit my next goal, so I have officially lost 10% of my body weight! I got my WW keychain and am so happy to have hit that goal. I still have a long way to go, but I'm finally noticing a difference in how I look and in how clothes fit. The skirt I wore today is one of my favorite skirts, but two months ago, it was painful to wear. It was so tight that it dug into my skin, and I may or may not have unzipped the top of it a little toward the end of the work day. Now it fits great, and is even heading toward being a little loose! I'm proud of myself for sticking with this for 12 whole weeks with no intention of stopping any time soon!

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12  Done, on schedule!
15 lbs. by October 10  Done, on schedule!
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24 Done, one week late (10/31)
20 lbs. by November 7
25 lbs. by December 5
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19
30 lbs. by January 2
35 lbs. by January 30
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 20
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!!

Second, I want to take part in something I've seen on some other blogs. Since November is the month of Thanksgiving, many bloggers are taking a couple of minutes a day to write about something they're thankful for. I think that's a great idea and will really force me to examine my life and all the gifts and blessings I've been given. So today, November 1st, I am thankful for electricity. With the freak snowstorm that hit this area over the week, hundreds of thousands of people in my state are without power. Many of these people were without power for up to a week just two months ago when Hurricane Irene hit New England. It was bad enough back then, but now it's gotten cold and with no electricity comes no heat. I'm very fortunate to have both and I'm thankful to be able to take hot showers and keep my food cold and type on this laptop. None of that would be possible without electricity, and while I may grumble when the bill comes, times like this remind me why I should be happy that I have electricity to pay for at all!

Frustration

Well, I didn't do it. I needed to lose 2.6 lbs this week to hit my 10% goal, but it didn't happen. Not even close. Despite the fact that I was where I needed to be on Saturday (granted, that was with my clothes off) I only lost one pound this week. It's frustrating because I did everything right. I exercised 5 days and earned 19 activity points, and didn't eat any of them. I also purposely avoided going out to watch football yesterday, and had 23 unused weekly bonus points. You would think that would add up to a nice loss for me, but nope.

The only thing I can think of is that lifting weights might be impacting my results on the scale, specifically lifting on Mondays, which are my weigh-in days. I've tried to do research on that, and most sites say that it doesn't matter. I've found a few sources though that say muscles hold onto water right after lifting as they work to repair themselves. So maybe that's it? I don't really want to switch from my Monday/Wednesday/Friday lifting routine, but if I have another disappointing weigh-in next week, I might have to.

After today, my next goal was to reach 20 lbs (down 2 lbs more) by November 7, two weeks from today. So with today's failure I'm looking at needing to lose 3.6 lbs in two weeks in order to get back on track. That's going to be tricky, if my progress as of late is any indication. Especially because on November 5 some friends and I are going tailgating at a college football game and even if we do try to make things WW friendly, I'm sure that will be a points-heavy day.

Blah. I'm just in such a gloomy mood now after going to WW. I'm so disappointed and quite honestly I just want to give up. I want to forget about portion sizes and number of points. I want to dive bomb into a tub of frosting and never come out. I won't, of course, because I know that overall I just need to keep pushing through and it'll all be worth it, but right now it just sucks.

Stupid Scales

I had a pretty good week with WW last week - as of Saturday morning, I still had 35 weekly points left, along with 13 activity points I'd earned from exercising 4 days during the week. I restarted ChaLean Extreme on Monday, so I wasn't quite sure how my body would react to reintroducing weight lifting into my routine. I know that long term, weight lifting is hugely beneficial to weight loss, but sometimes you can show a gain at first and I was nervous about it. So I was glad to see that when I weighed myself for my Biggest Loser weigh-in on Saturday, I was down 1.2 lbs. I proceeded to use all the rest of my weekly points and a few of my activity points over the rest of the weekend, but still, I was within the points that I had.

This morning before I left for work, I weighed myself wearing the clothes I would have on for WW. Still down 1.2 lbs. Awesome! I got to WW today feeling pretty hopeful. I stepped on the scale and was told I lost 0.4 lbs. WTF? Seriously? It would have been one thing to lose 0.4 if I had been expecting it. After having 30 points of beer yesterday, I would almost have deserved it! But having expected a better number, I'm feeling really disappointed. Plus, now that means I need to lose 2.6 lbs by next Monday in order to hit 10% on that date like I planned. It's doable, I know, because I've done it before, but not for over a month. My body doesn't seem to want to let go of weight that quickly anymore. I'm definitely going to give it my best effort, but it's a little more daunting than I would like! Blah.

On a more positive note, I had two non-scale victories last week. First, I discovered I was able to put my biggest pair of jeans on and off without unbuttoning/unzipping them. Yay! I don't feel like I look any different, but that's proof that I'm losing weight even if I don't feel it. Second, I saw a friend yesterday who I haven't seen in a while, maybe since late July. So he had no idea I was doing WW. He noticed my weight loss and that made my day. I've had other people tell me that they notice I lost weight, but they all know that I'm doing WW so I wonder how much of it is just them being encouraging. Which I appreciate, don't get me wrong, but somehow it means more coming from somehow who hasn't seen me in some time and who doesn't have a clue I've been working away at this.

I just need to focus on those things and less on the number on the scale, though that's easier said than done!

Just made it!

On my schedule of mini goals, I had decided that I wanted to reach 15 pounds by this week. Well, I did it! I needed to lose 1.8 lbs this week in order to hit the goal and I lost EXACTLY 1.8 lbs! Yay! Here's the updated schedule:

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12  Done, on schedule!
15 lbs. by October 10  Done, on schedule!
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24
20 lbs. by November 7
25 lbs. by December 5
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19
30 lbs. by January 2
35 lbs. by January 30
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 20
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!!

So now I've got two weeks to lose three more pounds and reach the next goal. And with that 10% goal I get my WW keychain! I don't know why I'm so excited for that silly keychain, but I am. I'd LOVE to get it by next week, but I don't know how realistic that is, so I won't be disappointed if it takes me two weeks to do it.

I'm also excited because I'm spreading the WW enthusiasm among my friends, family, and co-workers. My mom joined today and I'm really happy for her and looking forward to supporting each other on this. Two of my co-workers joined this week too, and will be going to meetings with my friend Colleen and me on Mondays. And, I have two friends thinking about signing up for online memberships. I love talking about WW and am so glad that I've helped inspire people to join. It sort of reinforced for me that I might like to look into being a meeting leader once I've hit my goal weight/lifetime member status. WW is hard work, no doubt, and frustrating at times, but I really believe in it and it's worked well for me so far, so I can't help but sing its praises!

Weight Loss is Confusing

I went to Weight Watchers today and I'm down 1.6 pounds. Yay, right? The part that's confusing is that this week should not have been a good one! I didn't even give points a thought last Tuesday when I went to the Big E and ate everything fried, dipped in chocolate, or covered in bacon that I could find. Since I definitely used all my weekly bonus points there, that meant I was all out on the second day of the week. That also meant that I went over by a point or two (or sometimes three) almost every day because I just can't forego my little after dinner treat. Granted, I did earn activity points to cover those overages, but still. And then Sunday I went to a friend's house to watch football and was parked directly in front of pizza, chips, cheese balls, and dip. And anyone who knows me knows that once something is in front of me, 9 times out of 10, it's going straight into my face. So on Sunday I stopped counting points by about 4pm.

Why then did I lose almost 2 pounds this week? And lost no weight two weeks ago when I didn't go a point over my bonus weekly and activity points? I just don't get it. I'm not complaining of course, I just wish there was a rhyme or reason to it so I could know what to expect from week to week. Does this mean that it's ok for me to splurge and go over my points here and there? I'm not so sure I want to get into the habit of that to find out the answer.

I guess all I can do is keep going as I have been. Stay within my points 5 or 6 days of the week, but don't beat myself up if I take a special occasion out with friends (and let's face it, Sunday is a special occasion during football season!) to enjoy the foods and drinks that I love.

The other thing I find confusing (well, maybe more annoying than confusing) is how, despite the fact that I've lost 13.2 pounds, which I feel is significant, I don't look or feel any different. A couple of people have said that they can see I've lost weight, but I don't know. These are all people who know I'm doing WW and trying hard to shed the pounds, so it's possible they're just trying to be encouraging. When I look in the mirror, I don't see anything different. My clothes really aren't fitting differently. Shouldn't there be a slight difference after losing almost 8% of my body weight so far? Maybe one day it'll be a sudden change that I see out of nowhere. Fingers crossed...

Next week is the next date on the goal calendar that I set for myself. 15 pounds by October 10, which will actually be October 11 because WW is closed on Columbus Day next week. That means I need to lose 1.8 pounds. It's definitely doable, but it won't be easy. I'm going to have to really be careful about the choices I make, and I'm going to have to drag myself out of bed to exercise in the mornings. I don't want to miss a goal this early in the process, so I've got to do it!

Slow Progress

Small loss at WW today - 0.6 lbs. Not terrible, especially because I definitely went over my points this weekend with everything I ate and drank while out in Boston with my brother and cousins. But not stellar either. I now have to lose 3.4 lbs in two weeks in order to meet the next goal that I set for myself. That's definitely doable, but it's not necessarily a sure thing, considering last week I was perfectly on plan and lost no weight.

But. I'm going to do my best to make it happen, and when I do, I'll only be 3 pounds away from my 10% goal and that keychain from Weight Watchers!

Overeating = The Visible Addiction

I read something on a blog today that really got me thinking. Emily of One Twenty Five wrote:
"sometimes being over weight sucks and is hard and isn’t fun - especially if you’re a girl in today’s society. Being over weight is the one vice that when you step out the door, everyone knows you have, so yea, it gets hard."

It's really true. You can be a smoker, or an alcoholic, or a sex addict and not have it be visible to the world automatically. But there's no way to hide the fact that you're an overeater. Now, I'm not advocating that anyone start drinking excessively or smoking crack to avoid food, as surely the path down those roads is no easier than that of an overweight person. In fact, I'd say that except for in extreme cases where overeating is causing significant health problems, it's one of the better vices to have, comparatively speaking. In a way, I feel pretty virtuous that my weakness is cake and cheesy poofs. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life, I am strictly a social drinker, I wouldn't know where to score drugs even if I wanted to, and given my recent prolonged streak of celibacy, I'd be the worst sex addict ever. So yay me! But, why then am I visually punished more so than people with those other vices or addictions? I've made (mostly) good choices in my life, yet my love of food is written across my arms, stomach, hips, ass, and thighs in a way no smoker or drinker ever experiences. Where is the justice there?

Stuck

So, Weight Watchers sucked yesterday. I lost no weight. Same exact weight as last week. At least it wasn't a gain, and I know I should be happy about that, but it still sucks. A whole week of tracking points and exercising like crazy for no progress at all. Blech. It would be one thing if I knew I cheated or went over my points. But I didn't, at all. Yes, I used every last one of my points, but that's what they're there for. And I even did little bits of exercise here and there throughout the week while watching TV that I didn't even log for activity points, so I thought that would help too. Nope. I still feel that I'll be able to hit my next goal with no problem - lose 4 pounds by October 10 - but I was hoping to make progress toward it this week. The closer we get to fall, with all its glorious foods and holidays and hiding inside under blankets, the harder it's going to be to lose weight, I know. So I wanted to have a good head start and not have my progress stalled. Plus, I'm super competitive, even with myself, and I hate that my streak of losing weight was broken. Five weeks in a row and then I blew it. Yuck.

Because I was frustrated yesterday, and just in a generally glum mood for a variety of reasons, I ate way more than I should have last night and used 10 of my extra weekly points yesterday. Stupid. I hate using points that early in the week, as that means now I have to exercise even more to give myself a cushion for the weekend. I'll be away this weekend visiting with family, and the foods available to me will be pretty much out of my control. I'm going to do my best to make good decisions, but it's a lot harder to do when I'm eating out at restaurants or eating food someone else has prepared. I NEED to post some good numbers on Monday though, both for my mental health and because on Tuesday I am taking the day off to go to the Big E, the largest fair in the Northeast. Basically, the Big E is synonymous with fried things, and Weight Watchers be damned, I'm going to enjoy myself!

At my WW meeting yesterday, the leader asked who uses all of their weekly points. I was absolutely shocked to find that most people don't. A couple of women even commented that 49 points is a lot and they have a hard time using them even if they wanted to. I'm sorry, WHAT??? I don't get it. Do these people never leave the house? I guess if I never went out with friends, or didn't drink alcohol, or had no life at all, it would be fairly easy to stick with the 29 points/day and not use many of the extra points. But wow, in my 6 weeks of WW so far, I think there was only one week where I didn't use all 49 points. Hell, the last two weeks I used them all plus 25 - 30 activity points. I'm sort of envious of these women that don't need to use them, but at the same time I wouldn't trade my life and the fun times I have with friends over good food and drinks for anything in the world.

Resentment

Sometimes I really resent having to lose weight. With the temperatures dropping and Fall officially arriving next week, the start of the unofficial baking season begins. I’m not as tempted to bake in the summer because I try to avoid having the oven on. And I’m out of the house more, keeping myself busy. But lately, baking temptations have been popping up everywhere. Brown Sugar Pumpkin Cheesecake with Chocolate Shortbread Crust? Cake Batter Blondies with Marshmallow Buttercream? Cheesy breadsticks to accompany big bowls of hot, comforting pasta? Yes, yes, and yes please.

But I can’t bake all of these things. Sure, I can make them, try one serving, and give the rest away, and I will do that sometimes. I love sharing my baking with people almost as much as I love eating it. That’s a lot of temptation to be around though, and even having just one little blondie could use up a whole meal’s worth of points. It’s nice that Weight Watchers gives you the flexibility of using your points that way if you want, but I know that’s not a healthy way to eat in the long-term.

I know I have no one but myself to blame, and that having bakefests are part of the reason I’m on this journey now, but it still sucks. It’s hard not to get really bratty and think it’s unfair that I can’t just eat what I want and enjoy all the deliciousness in the world. I don’t see this ever not being a struggle for me, and sometimes that seems overwhelming. I have a lot of Christmas cookie seasons ahead of me, a lot of friends’ birthdays and other special events, and it’s just plain exhausting to think about having to worry about points and putting limits on things for every special occasion for the rest of my life.

I know it’s worth it, or at least it will be once I’ve reached my goal and feel better about myself. But right now I just don’t like it. Not even a little bit. Not even at all.

I did it!

I went to Weight Watchers today for my weekly meeting and weigh-in, and I lost 3.2 lbs! That's even better than I'd expected, and means I got both another 5 lb. sticker for hitting the 10 lb. mark, and I got my 5% sticker as well. Yay!

If nothing else, this week was a great example of how you can eat a lot and still lose weight as long as you're still within your points. And that if the points you're given aren't enough for what you want to eat, you need to exercise. Without the 31 activity points that I earned, this week could easily have been a 3.2 gain! I'm feeling reassured that I can make it through football season and anything else ahead as long as I'm smart about it and am sure to do enough exercise to offset what I eat. A new week has begun, and so far, so good. Some fiber cereal for breakfast and half a Subway sandwich (meat and lots of veggies) and half a bag of Baked Lays for lunch leaves me with 18 points for the rest of the day, and it's already almost 2:30. Plenty of points to have a buffalo chicken quesadilla and a margarita or beer while I watch the Patriots tonight, and even enough for a WW ice cream bar for dessert! I'm not sure you're supposed to make your days so point-heavy at the end, but it's working for me so far. I'd much rather have a light breakfast (I pretty much never skip breakfast though) and have more flexibility later in the day. If I find myself hitting a plateau, switching that around will be one of the things I try to break through it, but for now, I'm not changing a thing.

I'll update my Mini Goals every time I reach one of the goals, or the date by which I was supposed to reach a goal. So here we go:

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12  Done, on schedule!
15 lbs. by October 10
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24
20 lbs. by November 7
25 lbs. by December 5
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19
30 lbs. by January 2
35 lbs. by January 30
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 20
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!!

I'm a pound ahead of where I planned to be today, which means I have four weeks to lose four pounds and reach my next goal. I'm hopeful that it won't take that long (and really, I'm determined that it won't) but I wanted to give myself some leeway when making these goals because I'd rather overestimate the amount of time and be pleasantly surprised than be too aggressive and be continually disappointed if I don't hit the marks. It's working so far!

Loving yourself

I read a lot of blogs. Mostly food blogs, which is pretty ironic given that I'm supposed to be trying to lose weight. On one of the baking blogs I read (http://buddingbaketress.blogspot.com/), the author, Kerry, wrote a different kind of post over the weekend, talking about her weight struggles. She's lost over 100 pounds, but recently gained back about 20 of them and is really frustrated with herself. Tons of readers left her encouraging comments that I sort of skimmed through, but one in particular stuck out to me.

That commenter basically said Kerry should love herself at any size and stop trying to lose weight, that her body has a weight it wants to be at and she shouldn't try so hard to fight it. The commenter mentioned that's overweight herself, but she and her boyfriend love her body and that's all that matters.

I have sort of mixed feelings about this. Yes, I absolutely believe we need to love ourselves, and that's something I'm working on. We need to not judge ourselves so harshly or be quite so critical. We need to give ourselves a break and cut ourselves some slack when we slip up and overindulge or hit snooze too many times and miss a workout. I'm not denying any of those things. However, as someone who has ridden the weight see-saw over the last decade, I know for a fact that life is just a little better when I'm thinner. It's easier to go clothes shopping. It's easier to walk up stairs. My knees hurt less. I feel more confident. Maybe I should still feel confident at the size I am now, but I don't. Is that wrong? I don't know. But I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to better myself, trying to gain a healthier life so that I can live longer with more enjoyment. If someone is truly happy and content at the weight/size they're at, more power to them. But for me, I am not happy with myself right now. I know I'll be a happier person when I can fit back into the clothes in my closet that are currently too small. I'll be a happier person when I don't feel the need to cross my arms over my waist when I sit down or hold a pillow in my lap when sitting on the couch. I'll be a happier person when I don't automatically assume a cute guy will go for the skinnier girl next to me in the bar. Maybe that's shallow of me to say, but I don't think so. I think it's real.

Football = Food

Weight Watchers is hard if you have any semblance of a social life. On days where I do nothing but go to work and go home, I rarely have a problem sticking within my 29 points. Sure, I still have to think about what I eat and make different choices than I would have a month ago, but I feel like I can generally still eat good foods and not feel totally deprived.

Days/nights when I go out are a different story. It is HARD to make good choices and to go without the foods that have become second nature to me to order. Weekly happy hours have become strategy sessions and pure tests of will power. Now that football season has started, that's even more the case. I go out to watch football with my friends nearly every week. And that involves beer, wings, burgers, etc. Foods that, to me, are as synonymous with football as turkey is with Thanksgiving. I figured out that last year, I averaged about 100 WW points in a single Football Sunday outing. That's a whole day's worth of points, plus the whole week of bonus points, plus almost another whole day. In an 8 hour span or so. Wow.

What I really like about WW compared to other "diet" programs is that you can eat what you want. There are no "forbidden fruits". No one saying I can't eat carbs, or fats, or chocolate, or whatever. And I like that. But going out and participating in the rituals that I've become used to has shown me that while it's true that I don't have to deny myself any of those things, they sure as hell add up. By halftime of the first game today, I'd already consumed 29 points. That's my entire day's points. With 5 buffalo wings and two pints of Shock Top Pumpkin Wheat. That's it. A whole day's worth of points. For food and beer that took no time at all to consume. What?? Yesterday I was home all day and had a hard boiled egg, a can of tuna with balsamic vinegar and olive oil, some homemade whole wheat tortilla chips, a buffalo chicken quesadilla, a fresh strawberry margarita, and a Weight Watchers ice cream bar for the same amount of points. Which is a better option? All of that, or what I consumed today in no time at all?

It's all about decisions and making choices about how best to use my points. Yes, I enjoyed my wings and beers, but because I'd already used up my 49 weekly points between happy hour and my friend's birthday on Friday, that meant that anything else I consumed for the rest of the day would be eating into my activity points. I earned 27 activity points this week, and wanted to save them so that any exercise was a bonus on top of my better eating and would accelerate my weight loss. I didn't want to touch them. But I did. I touched all 27 because of the things that I felt I "needed" to have to go along with a football game. And I ate two more points than I had. Which meant that when I got home, I needed to do a second workout today, just to earn a few more points and bring myself out of the negative. It's only week one and there's a lot of season left, so I've got to figure out how to balance the experience and atmosphere of watching football with some of my best friends with the knowledge that I cannot overdo it as much as I did this week. I'm hoping I didn't blow it for weigh in tomorrow, but even if I didn't, I may not be so lucky next time!

Starting Over

I started this blog nearly nine months ago but wrote a whopping total of 4 posts, 3 of which I just deleted. I want to start fresh, and intend, for the time being at least, for this to be a sort of a Weight Watchers diary as I follow the program. I want to post about both the ups and downs so that I have something to look back on as I stumble along the way.

I started Weight Watchers on August 9 and as of my weigh-in last week, I had lost 7.8 lbs. Pretty good for 4 weeks, I guess. I've been alternating really good weeks with so-so weeks, but luckily so far I've not yet posted a gain!

Week 1: -3 lbs
Week 2: -1 lbs (particularly remarkable considering it was my birthday week and I didn't count points for two and a half days!)
Week 3: -3.2 lbs
Week 4: -0.6 lbs

In Week 3 I earned my 5 lb. sticker, and this week I'm hoping to earn both my 5% and 10 lb. stickers. I need to lose 1.2 for my 5% goal and 2.2 to reach 10 lbs. Based on my home scale and my weight this morning, I should hit both of those goals when I go to weigh-in on Monday, but it all depends on how much self control and good judgment I have tomorrow on the first Football Sunday of the season!

All in all, I really like the Weight Watchers program. It's NOT easy, that's for sure. Not for someone that loves food as much as I do and whose social life revolves so much around eating and drinking. But, it IS doable. And it's really opened my eyes about my prior habits and how I got to a point where I needed to lose nearly 60 pounds to be at my ideal goal weight (which is still on the high end of the WW recommendations for someone of my height!). When I think now about the things that I used to eat without a second thought, and not only WHAT I ate, but how MUCH I ate, it's really pretty sickening and no surprise that I gained so much weight.

So, so far so good. I do see this as a program I can follow for an extended length of time, probably forever. I know I'll have bad days, and on those days I just need to remember the victories I have had along the way and remind myself that it's worth doing. I just turned 30 three weeks ago and I refuse to go through another decade of my life being unhappy and overweight and missing out on things because I'm too self-conscious. So this time it's clicked for me and I'm excited to see the progress I'll continue to make!

My Mini Goals:
10 lbs. by September 12
15 lbs. by October 10
18 lbs. (my 10% goal) by October 24
20 lbs. by November 7
25 lbs. by December 5
28 lbs. (my 15% goal) by December 19
30 lbs. by January 2
35 lbs. by January 30
38 lbs. (my 20% goal) by February 20
40 lbs. by March 5
45 lbs. by March 26
47 lbs. (my 25% goal) by April 9
50 lbs. by April 23 - GOAL WEIGHT!!

It's pretty discouraging when I look at the fact that it will likely take me another seven months to reach my goal weight, but I'm trying to be realistic. And I think that by setting up small goals, in either 5 lb. increments or based on small percentages, it gives me easier numbers to work toward and also lets me adjust my goals more easily if I find that I've been either too aggressive or not aggressive enough with my time frame.

Two more days until the next weigh-in!